AMAZING RACE – 10/14/12

We’re back and it’s week three already. The start of this leg is at a big fish market known for its “fresh produce.” It looks to be the same market that the dirty ice was delivered to in the last episode. I guess the word “fresh” has a different meaning in Indonesia, huh?

One of the first shots we see are of my least favorite team this season: Abbie and Ryan. He blabs on about how competitive they are—so much so that they compete with each other. Ha! How cute! Or not. Of course, he doesn’t miss a chance to mention that Abbie is competitive with her dance and he with his Jujitsu. First things first, is this b*tch on Dancing with the Stars or something? No. Who the freak is she competing against with dancing? Is she a ballroom dancer or something? Sounded like some ridiculous crap where he has to try to validate her stupid profession even though he thinks it’s dumb. And don’t get me started on the 1000th jujitsu mention. Can Mr. Miyagi please dig himself up and kick this guy’s ass Karate Kid style? By the way, I don’t know or care whether karate people fight against jujitsu people. I’m sure they don’t. It’s all lame to me, sorry. Anyway, I am so sick of this tool. Had to love the end of the scene when he puts a pseudo clothes line around Abbie’s neck, no doubt so that he could share with the world a view of his large bicep. I hate this guy.

We’re next seeing Natalie and Nadiya in a taxi and Natalie says “Quickly! Quickly! Zoom! Zoom! Zoom! Zoom!” First, I’d like to say that these two are growing on me. I find them hilarious. This exchange where Natalie basically yells words like it’s a 2 year old she’s trying to inspire to drive the taxi fast was pretty funny. These two kind of can’t get out of their own way most of the time, but I wouldn’t mind seeing them make it far.

We’re back with Josh and Brent at the starting gate—this starting gate being a stinky, dirty fish market. I just want to go out on a limb and say to the men out there: If you are not gay, don’t wear v-neck t-shirts. There’s a gay thing there now. They’ve claimed these shirts along with the rainbows. So if you’re in Banana Republic, and you’re not gay, pass them up. Not sure what it is about these shirts, if men are attracted to other men’s upper chest hair or lack of chest hair or something but you heard it here first. Anyway, Josh and Brent both have v-neck t-shirts on and it’s not all that huge of a surprise for me. I’d put 5 bucks on the fact that they’re probably actually from Banana Republic, too.

Moving along, the teams hit the Road Block. Basically, they have to balance and deliver 20 plates of really disgusting looking food. And I thought my waitress job sucked. Actually, it did. I still say that waitressing is the worst job I ever had. It was always the really demanding pr*cks, you know, the ones that have you running for sh*t every time you come anywhere near their table that leave you 27 cents for a tip. And don’t get me started on the old people. They are still tipping like it’s 1930. Of course, the college kids are too, so there goes that theory. And I hated the people that were basically like I am now—the ones with the kids. These people come in thinking it’s cute to have the kids tell their server directly what they want. Picture a waitress, in the weeds with 50 tables, sitting there having to act patient while little Johnny gets over his freaking shyness to finally effing order. And you can never understand what these little dolts are saying. I’ve made a vow to always order for my kids. No one thinks they are as cute as you are, morons. Anyway, let me take myself out of 1993 and back to this task. Plates fall often, break, and the local people laugh and clap. Not much going on here. Lexi had more plates to stack than brain cells in her head, so this should have been more fun than it actually was.