Without all that much fanfare over the scorpions, the teams hit the Detour: Fire or Foul. “Fire” was trying to make fire using two sticks, zebra manure and grass. I kind of think they owed us an explanation as to how the poop helps, but they left us hanging on that one. “Fowl” was trying to catch a guinea fowl by building and then triggering a trap. Luckily, we didn’t have to actually see any actual necks snapping.
Bates, Anthony and “the girls” choose fire together. Of course. Bates gets his fire going pretty quickly and tries to give the girls some pointers, but they pretty much stink at it. He is right when he says he doesn’t think they’ll be able to do it. Katie and Max head toward the fire task with their three Bushmen in the back of their car. Katie keeps talking about how badly it smelled in the car. She even gets one more shot in when they get to the fire site when she says, “My God, they stink!,” just dripping with detest. Seriously, what a b*tch. I get it, they probably did stink. But Katie could not have sounded shallower. She may be smart but she’s not showing herself to be all that classy or tolerant. Anyway, Max says he’s in “cigar sales” so he should have no trouble lighting this fire. Yeah, that’s why it took you two hours to fail at it and then you had to switch tasks. Moron.
Chuck rolls up on the “fowl” task and says he has done a lot of trapping. That wasn’t that big of a surprise. Pam and Winnie were sitting there trying to make their trap when Chuck showed up. They said they didn’t want to see him there. They suspected his usual morning routine probably consists of brushing his teeth and then making a snare. Probably right, except maybe for the “brushing his teeth” part. Anyway, Chuck said his job in high school was trapping animals and cashing them in at the “fur exchange.” Wow. I worked at a Burger King. So, Chuck shows up and basically pushes the Bushmen aside and sets the trap without even a demonstration. In fact, I wouldn’t have been surprised if he had actually caught a couple of birds in his trap. Chuck finished quickly, gave the bushmen some pointers on what they could be doing better, and then rolled on toward the pit stop with his puffy mullet blowing in the breeze. Take that, Dr. Katie.
The rest of the teams had lots of trouble with the fire task. Meghan and Joey, the roller derby moms, the country girls and Max and Katie all give up and switch to the fowl task. It came down to a footrace to the pit stop, with Max and Katie and the roller derby moms in the back of the pack.
Pit stop order:
1. Bates and Anthony
2. Pam and Winnie
3. Chuck and Winona
4. Joey and Meghan
5. Caroline and Jennifer
6. Mona and Beth
7. Max and Katie (Non-elimination leg; they’ll have a speed bump on the next leg.)
See you next week!
Written by: Kim Wilson
Email: kwilson1101@gmail.com
Twitter: kwilson111