By the way, anyone else notice how lax the Race has gotten with the teams and what they wear? Everyone apparently has a team “color” to wear. Most seasons each team will wear matching Under Armour jackets or something in clothes that look to be suitable for racing and competing. This season is stuff like Rachel in this crazy getup and Brendon in some green and gray printed flannel shirt. No idea what is going on this season, but just something I noticed last night. I probably wouldn’t have picked up on it had Rachel not decided to dress like she was headed out for a night at the roller rink in 1984.
The Southerners have apparently managed to be the only team that wasn’t able to make it onto the first flight. They are scheduled to arrive about an hour and a half after the first flight. Apparently, they have no clue about it though until Danny and Joey Fitness, those two brainiacs, bring it up. Real smart, Team ‘Roids. If you’re gonna clue them in, at least wait until the rest of you are boarding the first plane. Don’t give them time to try to get on stand by, right? Not a great strategy. Anyway, they do try to get on stand by thanks to these two dummies, albeit unsuccessfully, but still….Get a brain, guys. You’re racing for a million dollars, not a big jug of Creatine. I was kind of hoping the Southerners were able to get on the flight and these two were eliminated because of it. Personally, I love when people are rewarded for their stupidity.
After a day, the first flight lands in Italy. We see BB Rachel and Brendon in a taxi. Rachel says that she now knows why Italians hate Americans—because Americans are idiots. Speak for yourself, Rachel. I myself wouldn’t be wearing fuzzy leg warmers and a beret in Italy. Your outfit basically screams “I’m an idiot.” And after the Italians see her antics in their country, I’d be surprised if they ever let her back in.
More deep thoughts from Joey Fitness and Danny in their taxi. Danny used to date an Italian girl and could never trust her. Um, okay. What exactly is your point? I’ve got a pretty good idea that this “Italian” girl no doubt resembles one of those classy Jersey Shore chicks. Not thinking that you can generalize some skank wearing booty shorts on the Seaside Heights boardwalk who thinks that Italy is the capital of Spain to a female actually from Italy, but whatever. These two don’t exactly seem like world travelers to me.
On to Dave and GF in their taxi. Dave starts to bicker with GF, whining that he can’t see out of the windshield because GF has her visor down. He thinks that HE can’t see? Imagine the traffic going in the other direction. The freaking sun is reflecting off that solar panel of a forehead she’s got going on. I’m surprised we weren’t seeing cars crashing, motorcycle riders bouncing off the hood of their car and fireballs all around them. I will say, these two certainly know how to bicker. They are marginally more mature at it than Rachel and Brendon, but they definitely hold their own. This guy is probably going to volunteer to do 15 tours of duty abroad just to stay away from this chick.
Next, the Fast Forward was revealed. They mislead us a little and make it sound like someone gets to land a helicopter on a building and then, if done successfully, the team can go right to the pit stop. After JJ and Art get to the Fast Forward, they find out that it’s a remote control helicopter that has to be landed on a model of a heliport worn on the other teammate’s head. We got something similar to this for my son from Brookstone for Christmas. Not quite the same thing as landing a real helicopter, but okay. I guess they aren’t exactly going to have any of these brainiacs risking millions of dollars worth of equipment and the lives of the Italians below on this one. Not a huge surprise in retrospect. I could see them a little scared if those Southerners were first to the Fast Forward. I can’t quite see them navigating a real helicopter.
The Road Block is presented next: One teammate has to rappel down the inside of a building and grab a clue within 2 minutes or the task has to be started over.
BB Rachel says she’s feeling good about the Road Block because she’s rappelled before and “it’s really fun.” Pretty much something a five year old would’ve said. All I ask is that SOMEONE’S cable breaks. This could be our chance to get rid of someone really annoying. Watching Rachel perform a task with Brendon’s constant reassurance in the background was painful once on Big Brother. Twice it was agony. This time, it borders on torture. Please CBS, spare us the Survivor trifecta with these two. Well, unless you can promise that an alligator eats one or both of them whole before our very eyes. Last shot is of feet and fuzzy leg warmers disappearing into the mouth of a large gator. THAT I’d watch. “Survivor: Everglades.” Love it.
Next, Dave feels the need to tell us he has a wedgie about three times from the rappel equipment. Thanks, Dave. Haven’t felt like I’m back in fourth grade in awhile, but yet here I am.
After the rappel Road Block the teams have to find a clue in a Tin Lizzie at a museum. Love how they added in a nice Ford Focus commercial spot and some crap where they “tell us” about an auto park feature but disguise it as if it is part of a challenge for the racers. Thanks guys, we’re idiots and don’t get that Ford’s a sponsor here. Why would they even make this look like part of a challenge? I have a funny feeling that if one of the cars launched off during this auto parking thing and crashed into 15 other cars and then right into the crotch of the Statute of David, somehow we wouldn’t be seeing it. So much for this “challenge.”
GF and Dave are discussing whether to go for the Fast Forward helicopter task or head to the Road Block. Dave’s apparently on a power trip about having flown helicopters before and how good he’d be at the Fast Forward, so they start bickering again. I totally get that Dave has a point there, but JJ and Art have been over at the Fast Forward for awhile already. That must be the case because other teams have moved even beyond the rappelling at this point. Had to agree with GF on this one.
Am I the only one who was hoping (ok, I was darn near begging) for BB Rachel’s rappelling rope to snap and cause her to fall into a crumpled heap at the bottom of that spiral whatever it was? There’s never been a more annoying person in the history of television than Rachel.
The only reason Brendan can be sticking with her is for the occasional 5 minutes of reality show fame. Otherwise he would have slit her throat a long time ago. I know I would have, and I can put up with a lot of crap. Her? She would have been toast within 10 minutes with me.
K, maybe I better read the blog next time before commenting….lol. Glad you also think Rachel needed to take the fast elevator to the bottom without a parachute. Friggin’ annoying bitch… Here’s hoping she comes across a mafia boss who doesn’t like the way she dresses. Or better yet, since they’re currently in Turin, lets wrap her in a shroud and stuff her into a cave for the scientists to discover in 2000 years. I can already hear them asking why such an ugly f’ing person was wrapped in a shroud like Jesus. Its no way to abuse such an expensive shroud.
No one is commenting on Vanessa’s comment about “not having that much sausage since high school”? OMG! And BB Rachel needs to be gone!